I was tired, it was already midnight and I didn’t want to wake up in the dark, but hell, if I expected my clients to show up for themselves, how could I even consider not doing the same for myself? This is what I told myself as I set my alarm for 5 a.m. for early morning self portraits.
It had been a hard summer. I knew I needed to do something that would make me feel powerful. Worthy. Inspired. I wanted to feel STRONG again and I needed to celebrate the parts of myself that I loved-and even the parts that i didn’t like so much, but was learning to. The independent, free spirited, passionate woman was still there and I needed to reconnect with her in a way that I hadn’t been able to in a while.
I set up my camera and tripod, stripped down and started my own little boudoir session. Ironically, there happened to be a racing event on the salt flat starting that very same morning and as dozens of cars rolled in, I wondered how I chose this day- with all these spectators driving by- as the day to frolick around naked in the desert. Laughing to myself for a moment, I debated on moving to a different spot or even calling the whole thing off.
Instead I just let go.
I spent over an hour out there, posing, snapping a few shots, and running back to the camera to see what I had captured. It was exhilarating! There is nothing like being nude in nature with the vastness and warm breeze of the desert hugging me.
I will truly never forget the feeling as I packed up my gear, threw my tripod over my shoulder, and walked out of the salt flat, having just documented the woman I was on that day. Not the woman I wanted to be next year, or the one I had been months prior, but the one I was today- with all her imperfections, failures, success, love, loss, and magic. I wasn’t perfect and I still had a lot of work to do, but I was proud of who I had become. Never in my life had I felt so liberated.
I’ve made a promise to myself, that I will continue taking these portraits annually, celebrating my uniqueness, my connection to self, and the new and improved woman that I become with each passing year. It is my therapy and I’m so grateful to be able to share it with you, my friends.
Want more info on your own liberating boudoir session? I’d love to hear from you- Contact the studio HERE.